Do You Want Fries With That?

Butter Makes It Better

2012-01-30T08:24:00.000-08:00

Last week, it was Aubrey's chapstick (and she was NOT amused)

Two weeks ago, it was gobs and gobs of Vaseline. (have you ever tried to get Vaseline out of hair?)

Today, it's butter...

Always in the hair - I don't know why, but it's always in the hair. Someone needs to keep an eye on this kid....or maybe give him a haircut.

UPDATE: Due to a nice runny nose he also started today, you can guess what I'm also washing out of his hair... I love him. I really do.

Thank You Gmail

2012-01-15T19:22:00.000-08:00

I have three siblings currently serving full-time LDS missions. With technology being what it is today, I was able to speak with and see (via Skype) all three of them at Christmas-time. Kristi and Holly are both on Spanish-speaking missions in Washington D.C. and Tampa, Florida respectively. Devin is in Russia. I love that I can also email them little insignificant updates and try to support them as best as I can - in fact, they all get a copy when I post to this blog (which unfortunately hasn't been much lately) so I have to watch what I say...

Anyway, I am just giggling right now because I just received an email from Devin. You have to understand how Gmail (which is my email-provider) works to understand that sometimes it will only show you part of the original message unless you click on a box that will open up ALL of the text. Well, this particular message got clipped in such a way that I still can't wipe this stupid smile off my face.

2011 To-Do Lists

2011-12-22T13:31:00.000-08:00

Click the text to make it bigger...

Dear Santa, Love Ben

2011-12-20T07:26:00.000-08:00

I snagged this from Ben's backpack as he was headed out the door for school this morning.

Here's to Monday Morning

2011-12-19T07:23:00.001-08:00

Here's to Monday Morning - to waking up late for no reason at all.
To shoveling Rice Chex down Aubrey's throat and hurrying Ben putting on his clothes.
To running out to their school bus, with Jake who is wearing his breakfast on his PJs.
To a house that smells like garlic and onions, because yesterday's dishes were never done.
To the hour it will take to do them because I still have to empty clean dishes from the dishwasher.
To smelly clothes that have sat (washed) in the washing machine, so I have to wash them all over again.
To starting off my week behind on everything plus those other things I can't even think of right now.
To Jake who is now eating the Mac N Cheese from last night off the table
To knowing that as hard as I work, everything will look and feel and smell the same tomorrow morning.
Here's to Monday Morning - to going back to bed for no reason at all.

Oh Yes...Thanksgiving

2011-12-02T11:17:00.000-08:00

As I sit here polishing off the rest of the DELICIOUS sweet potatoes Joel (yes, Joel) made for Thanksgiving last week, I feel the need to disclose (brag) a bit about our Thanksgiving this year.

We did it. Just us. Thanksgiving. First Time. Ever.

The Things that Were Delicious Menu:
Turkey
Homemade Stuffing
Rolls (not homemade)
Sweet Potatoes
Deviled Eggs
Stuffed Mushrooms

The Thing that Was Not:
Mashed Potatoes (how anyone can mess up mashed potatoes, I'll never know. But I did.)

Unfortunately, I have but one picture to prove that our little family of five made, ate and clean-up Thanksgiving. Sneaky little Jake...or should I say "devilish" little Jake?

P.S. Really...how can you mess up mashed potatoes???!!!!

Your Info (If You Please)

2011-12-01T14:28:00.000-08:00

Please Update Your Christmas Card Info with me by sending me a FB message or email ASAP.

The choice is yours.

If you'd like a card in the mail - I need your address.

If you'd rather receive it via email - I need your email address.

If you just want to view it online, do nothing and you'll see it here and on FB in week or so.

It's Your Birthday (Aubrey)

2011-11-28T11:34:00.000-08:00

Let's just roll right into the picture story from Aubrey's birthday this weekend and forget that I've been AWOL for the past few weeks. And tell me, do you hate that I put the "caption" of the picture on the top instead of on the traditional bottom of the photo? I see it more as a commentary than a caption. (and maybe I like to instruct you what to think before I show you my pictures)

Aubrey has been requesting a butterfly birthday cake for as long as she could say "butterfly birthday cake." After I searched around for the perfect one to make, I was afraid she might have changed her mind, but sure enough, the morning of her birthday, she reminded me that she was getting a butterfly birthday cake. I may have been more excited about the final outcome after the time I put into them, but Aubrey's face (which we didn't capture soon enough) displayed much satisfaction with her Third-Birthday-Butterfly-Cake:
I'd make these sweet little cupcakes again in a heartbeat. They were really fun...and you KNOW that I'm really not into this kind of stuff...then again, maybe I am. One more proud picture please:
So, presents went mostly like this: opening plenty of pink girly girly stuff and big oohs and aahs and happiness radiating from Aubrey:
...Until it came to open Joel's present, which was an adorable mom and toddler doll-set which he'd specially picked out. She opened it and promptly announced "I don't like that!" and reached for the next present. (she likes it now - she was just a little excited about all the girly girly stuff and not in the mood for toys at the time)
Our friends, Mindi, Chris and Riley helped us celebrate and provided her with a make-up bag...complete with a makeover.
Thank you "Aunt Mindi!"
After all that makeup and after her announcement about Joel's gift choice, I was a little nervous to give her the Dora Backpack I had picked-up at Kohl's weeks ago and had been DYING to give her. Turns out, the Dora Backpack was her long-lost kindred spirit. She held it like this with her eyes closed for almost a whole minute. (notice the cheap-mommy-clearance tag?)
I am so happy to have my Aubrey. She is spunky and fun and keeps me on my toes.

Things To Do

2011-10-13T09:51:00.000-07:00

You know those moms that pretty much let their kids run wild and assume that somehow they'll learn their colors, numbers, shapes, reading, writing, arithmetic... Yup, I'm one of those. Oh, occasionally I'll take advantage of a teaching/learning moment, but I definitely don't carve out specific time to work on letters or rhyming. Some moms do. This mom don't. I send Ben to preschool and that's about it.

So, you can only imagine how surprised I was this morning to see some additional scrawling on my list of things to do.

It made me smile and touched my heart on a few levels. Thank heavens for children that remind me of the most important things on my "to-do" list...

The Reading Mother

2011-10-11T15:59:00.000-07:00

I love reading, and I won't apologize for being a bookworm. But I was just re-acquainted with this lovely poem and realize that I need to be better about reading aloud to my children because I want them to someday say:

I had a mother who read to me
Sagas of pirates who scoured the sea.
Cutlasses clenched in their yellow teeth;
"Blackbirds" stowed in the hold beneath.
I had a Mother who read me lays
Of ancient and gallant and golden days;
Stories of Marmion and Ivanhoe,
Which every boy has a right to know.
I had a Mother who read me tales
Of Gelert the hound of the hills of Wales,
True to his trust till his tragic death,
Faithfulness lent with his final breath.
I had a Mother who read me the things
That wholesome life to the boy heart brings-
Stories that stir with an upward touch.
Oh, that each mother of boys were such!
You may have tangible wealth untold;
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be --
I had a Mother who read to me.
By Strickland Gillilan

The Heart Song

2011-09-30T09:02:00.000-07:00

It's 9am and already I've thrown a full-blown adult temper tantrum. I have no excuses for myself. In short: Everyone was crying/whining and I decided that yelling/locking myself in a room was a good way to respond. So you see, now you have proof that it's not always doughnuts and veggies over here.

So, we decided to go to the YMCA.

Thank heavens for the Y. I know it sounds a little man-ish, but I needed to blow off some steam. I actually tried out some free weights after my regular work-out, which I don't think I've touched since high school gym class.

On the way over, we were all kind of grumpy. I turned on the radio to break the awkward silence that sometimes happens between a 30-year-0ld, a 4-year-old, an almost 3-year-old and a one-year-old. As soon as the music started playing, we all couldn't help but smiling. It was Ben's favorite song. He calls it "The Heart Song." Can you guess what it is?

Well, here's the YouTube Music Video of Ben's favorite song. I hadn't watched it before just now, but it's clean. Great song, great artist, but the video is a little lame (of course I think most music videos are) - there is a part that I loved though: a bunch of white ceramic dishes being thrown against a wall and breaking into a huge mountain of broken dishes. Why do I like it? Because I've always wanted a "dish-breaking" room to go blow off steam. Like I said - Thank heavens for the YMCA.

Do you have your guess? In case you don't want to watch the video, I'll just tell you what "The Heart Song" is. You ready? "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele. Enjoy.

Oops and I almost forgot. As we were leaving the Y, Aubrey was sad. I asked her what would make her happy. She replied, "The Heart Song."

Sparkle and Shine

2011-09-29T11:07:00.000-07:00

Aubrey fell off some playground equipment on Saturday and fractured her arm (buckle fracture, nothing serious). We've been trying to get her to keep the plain, boring-blue sling on since Monday - I don't know why I didn't think to Aubrify it sooner:

Now the trick will be getting her to take it off in three weeks.

Introducing "Arnie"

2011-09-27T09:59:00.000-07:00

Lest I portray a rather false "healthy family" image for more than 24-hours, here's a peek at a book the kids are reading this week (Children's Book Lists + Library = Happiness)Perhaps reading isn't so "good" for us afterall...

I'm not sure who had more fun with this - Ben keeps asking me if we can make "Arnie the doughnut" again, but even while the words "Maybe another day" come out of my mouth, I want to grab my keys and go buy more doughnuts immediately!

Veggie Monsters

2011-09-26T13:33:00.001-07:00

Temporary* solution to the inevitable "MOMMY, I'M HUNGRY!" at 4:30pm. (note, the Ranch dressing dip is a key - but not always necessary) *I say 'temporary' because I'm learning that there is never a trick that will work everyday or for an extended period of time. As a parent, you always have to be refreshing your toolbox.

Here's what I love about this tactic:

-the kids are eating their veggies.
-at dinner, I can serve MORE veggies and not feel bad if they don't eat a ton
-I get some peace to actually MAKE dinner
-I might even have a veggie or two while I'm waiting for dinner to cook
(instead of soda or sweets)
-All of the above make me feel good about myself

I'm sure many of you have other simple things you do for your kids or yourself that just make you feel good. Want to share?

All Eyes on Aubrey

2011-09-23T15:14:00.001-07:00

This is what happens when I leave the Princess with access to our limited art supplies and step into the other room to quickly check my email. A woman works with what she's got (glitter glue and googly eyes, in this case):

Waiting for the Bus

2011-09-22T09:53:00.001-07:00

Ben's bus picks him up at 8am Mon-Thurs, then I take the other two to the YMCA so they can play and I can get a quick work-out in before Jake naps. Here are some scenes from this morning:

Ben is becoming such a goofy little boy. I love it.

Will Jake ever walk?
Unrelated, but: Aubrey has been telling everyone that she is three because she couldn't figure out how to hold up just two fingers. This morning, she had her break-through.

Oozing with Pride

2011-09-20T15:49:00.000-07:00

This post probably should be about something I'm just tickled about that one of my kids did.

Nope. It's about me. About what I did.

Take a look:

And now, the story (because I do love to tell a story, especially when it features yours truly)

So, once upon a time, a friend gave me this chair. We loved it. (HooHobbers makes it) But apparently, it couldn't handle the wear-and-tear from her five children plus two of mine. When the denim seat portion tore, the frame was still good, so I contacted them to see how much just the fabric would be. $23. Sigh. I just can't spend money sometimes. Even knowing all the happiness that $23 would bring my children, I just couldn't do it. So, the fabric hanging from the door handle in the above picture is what I had to work with.

I'm no seamstress, as you know, and well, I am a slightly terrified of projects. I did notice that we had some jeans that were in the Goodwill pile, so I cut them up as best I could to match the original torn fabric. Easy enough. Then, I pulled out my sewing machine and set everything out on my kitchen table. Easy enough

This was last Wednesday, though, so for the last six days I have hemmed and hawed and ignored and stared and been generally flustered by the very thought of sitting down to work it out. Is it worth my time? Did I cut it right? Will it fit when I'm done sewing it? Will the (bleep)in sewing machine cooperate?

I give you a resounding "YES!" to all of the above questions. Although the sewing machine gave me some grief, it was to be expected and was nothing insurmountable. It was so worth it. I don't even care if the kids never sit in it again. I DID IT! I can hardly fit my head into my kitchen right now I'm so proud of little ole me.

I did it.

DingDong The Cricket's Dead

2011-09-16T09:13:00.000-07:00

Our hiatus to Utah (AKA "the mothership") ended last week. It was lovely. Needed. Fun. Looooonnnnngggg.

Unfortunately, when we got back, there was a chirping sound that disturbed our otherwise peaceful slumber in our home that is cooled down to 78 degrees. (I am insinuating that we freeze whenever we go to Utah. It's ridiculous. Everyone else is complaining it's hot and I'm making sure my kids have their winter PJs on)

So - back to the chirping. It didn't bother me too much the first few nights. I am a pretty sound-sleeper. We found and killed a few of crickets, but still chirping continued. Then, it wasn't just a nightly chirp. Some idiot in the orchestra (now I know why they use that word to describe a group of crickets) decided it would be amusing to continue chirping all. day. long.

After hunting and spraying and half a bottle of ibuprofen, I think we got them. All of them. The whole dang orchestra.

So, this morning I no longer felt under siege and had a clear enough head to doing a little something with the kids. Anyone in the mood for lemon cookies as mid-morning snack?

Just When You Think It's Safe To Open the Mailbox

2011-08-01T08:45:00.000-07:00

We had some dear friends over last night and suffice it to be said, our children had a blast playing together while we generally ignored them so we could chat it up.

When it came time to clean up, we just shoved toys into any bin they would fit in, threw said bins under the bed and in the closet, so our children could sleep while we continued to hang out.

This morning, I decided to "fix" the "clean" bedroom. (I'll tell you about my labeled bins and general organizational policies another day)

Little did I know the surprise Elmo had waiting for me:

I thought it was a "play egg" from the play food set that we have, until I saw the goobers. Now my toy-fix-up-job has turned into a sanitizing project. Joy.

Also, I think I need to say that I'm 110% sure the egg-tabulous surprise is brought to you by the letter "A" and the number "2" (I thought I noticed a missing egg yesterday, but dismissed it as only something a crazy lady would think)

Today (Dad's home and wur havin' fun)

2011-07-30T15:30:00.000-07:00

While Grandma Vogie was watching the kids last weekend so I could escape to San Diego, she bought the kids a blow-up wading pool. In her words: Best $20 I ever spent.

Today - in an effort to give poor daddy a break from the "Daddy-look-at-mes" and "Daddy-pick-me-ups" and just the repetitive "Daddy-dad-daddy-daddy-dad-dad-daddys" - I filled up the "froggy pool" as a distraction.

Ben went for it:

So did Aubrey, but she landed out of the pool and into the:

This girl LOVES getting dirty. When I asked Ben why he didn't want to play with her, his reply was: I don't like mud. Go figure.

Tomorrow

2011-07-29T10:49:00.000-07:00

We're pretty excited over here. The kids are coloring pictures for Aunt Kristi and Holly (serving missions back east) while I attempt to speed-clean the house in preparation for Joel's return tomorrow.

Now, I know it's only been a month and I know we'll have much longer family separations in our future in the Navy. I know I was able to sneak out (thanks to my dear mother and a Delta sorry-we-overbooked-your-flight pass) and visit him in San Diego this past weekend. Still, we are just tickled to know that 24 hours from now HE WILL BE HERE. Home. Our house will feel like home again.

So, while the kids trash the kitchen table (because you know the markers aren't just coloring the paper), I thought I'd make a record of some of the things we've learned this month without daddy home. In no particular order:

We like Ramen noodles. Lots and lots of Ramen noodles.
Mommy has a temper. Wait. We already knew this. Let's rephrase: When Daddy is around, Mommy is much better at controlling her temper.
Netflix streaming through the Wii is a gift sent directly from heaven.
When Ben is scared, he can sleep with Mommy.
When Aubrey is scared, she can have a hug and go right back to flailing about in her own dang bed.
We also like cereal. Straight out of the bag. All. day. long.
Doctors will prescribe anything to the child of a crazy-eyed woman when it's her fifth time at the office that month toting behind three small children. (this month's sicknesses are not far enough in the past for even me to joke about yet)
The YMCA is the only place Mommy can go to the bathroom uninterrupted. This is motivation enough for keeping a daily exercise routine.

The children have now completely colored their arms and hands. Sigh. Maybe I'll just send the missionaries a picture.

In the Clear

2011-07-07T11:11:00.000-07:00

10 days of antibiotics behind us. Hooray!

Good Things Come in Threes

2011-06-28T12:32:00.000-07:00

Also, doesn't Jake look like a Bobble-Head in the picture of him on the sidebar?
--------------------->

Table Topping

2011-06-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

Earlier this month, a friend and fellow blogger, Paula, was getting rid of a table. She'd started refinishing the top, ran into some problems, then found one on Craigslist that she liked, so she didn't need the old one anymore. Paula was kind enough to send out an email asking if anyone needed a table. Well. WE needed a table. So, I picked up this table and five chairs from her. It's shown here with both leaves in (a table with leaves is heaven-sent when you are dividing 900 sq feet between five people)

The incomplete top didn't even look bad - we almost just started eating right off of it as it was. I did some googling about refinishing tables and it seems that the finish will generally gum-up belt sanders if you go that route, which is what I think Paula had tried to do. Well, since we don't have a belt sander anyway, Joel thought maybe he could get off the finish with some pumice-stone looking attachment on his drill - some kind of buffing thing. (funny how a Sara-project turns into a Joel-slave-labor camp) I did help with the sanding though (using progressively finer sand-paper) - we made a lot of mistakes, but got it looking like this:

Next, I went to the store and snagged some wood stain and polyurethane coating for the table and vinyl fabric for the chair covers (easier to clean). I wasn't impressed at all with the color selection for either the vinyl or the stain, so I ended up with plain old boring white vinyl and a stain called "early american" - which I thought might be too light, but since we were going to do a polyurethane coating too I thought it would work out. Let's just say that the stain turned out much darker than anticipated.

I'm told now that two-toned tables are "in." Perhaps someone was just trying to be nice. Anyway, I cut up the fabric and Joel put coat after coat of the polyurethane one. I also put staples in the staple gun and Joel stapled the new fabric on the cushions. Like I said, this is one of "my" kind of projects. Of course, Joel and I can see all of our errors on the table, but to the untrained eye, I'd say it didn't turn out half bad.

I'm LOVING having my whole family seated around the table. THANK YOU!!

Jake-in-the-box

2011-06-02T14:21:00.001-07:00

I heard him giggling in the other room and found him with the basket on his head.

Oh how I love him.

**Also - aside from this comment I am typing on my computer right now - this post and it's picture were taken and published using my free phone. This could be a problem.**

We Love Jonah.

2011-05-27T13:42:00.000-07:00

Lynnell made a comment yesterday that Ben & Aubrey will be friends until Ben loses a best-friend to Aubrey.

Being a little obsessive about things going my way, I have actually thought of this. So, since I'm doomed to have some guy break their friendship, I figured I might as well pick the guy...and his family.

When we moved into our current home, I met a pregnant lady at church who was pregnant with her fourth boy. (I say "lady" because it sounds silly to say that I met a "girl" who was pregnant with her fourth child) We became friends and I've pretty much loved Jonah since he was born. I couldn't help myself. He was so little and cute and has the most winningest of smiles. He still is so little and cute and has the most winningest of smiles. I'd be a terrible mother to him though - giving him whatever he wants, whenever he wants it.

So, when we had Aubrey, Jonah's mom and I have tried to sneakily throw the two of them together. It's tricky business - you can't make them be friends. If you force them to play together, they'll resent it. We've also had to include Ben, but not too much so that Aubrey gets pushed aside. It's required a lot of finesse, but, well, if you call "Princess Snow White Aubrey and Jonah feeding ice cream to the seven dwarfs" a success - you can just congratulate us now.

The Denial & Confession

2011-05-26T13:43:00.000-07:00

Of course I didn't flick her lip! (*cough* right then *cough*)

Princess Aubrey had been "twirling" in a rather small space (which could basically be anywhere in our home) and gracefully introduced her cheekbone to the wall.

But to be completely honest, I've been rather grumpy lately. The fuse I was born with was already short and although I've been able to re-direct life's "sparks" using self-help techniques combined with plain, old-fashioned prayer, I don't always succeed. I also passed said "short fuse" on to my 2-year-old girl, so when sparks fly, one or both of us is bound to explode.

It happened a week or so ago at the table. I referred to this week as "angry week" in an email to a friend. Aubrey was in rare form and I'd had it, so I leaned over and "bopped" her on the lip. Immediately, the crying begins...coming from big-brother-Ben.

Yes, my sweetheart, Ben, was also sitting at the table. He was offended by it and won't let me forget it for a second.

Which makes me wonder if some of the things we remember our parents doing in our childhood only happened once or twice, but since they made such an impression on us we remember them as frequent occurrences. What do you think?

The Accusation

2011-05-25T16:14:00.001-07:00

10 minutes ago: Ben rushes into the room when he hears Aubrey start crying.

I suggest Aubrey may need a hug, so he complies.

Then, he looks me in the eyes and asks "Did you do this* mom?"

*"This" - Ben said while demonstrating his meaning by flicking his lip with his pointer finger.

At least they have a common enemy to bring them together.

Bathroom Crisis

2011-04-08T13:02:00.001-07:00

Aubrey snuck in on Ben and flushed the toilet while he was still doing his business this morning...which of course made Ben SO mad/sad.

"NO!" he screamed. "AUBREY!... MOMMY!"

Then, (crying)

"I WANT MY POOP BACK!"

"Because I Said So"

2011-04-04T10:24:00.000-07:00

I can't figure out my sweet two-year-old. She's happy-as-pie in the store shopping for applesauce and crackers, but we stop at the post office to mail some items and when it's time to leave she breaks down.

"I don't WANT to go HOME." (she's screaming the entire sentence, the capital letters indicate screeching)

"What's the problem Aubrey? Why don't you want to go home?"

"I WANT TO STAY HERE!!!"

"Honey, we have to go home. You need to go potty." -at which she brightens considerably because she knows when she goes potty in the toilet, she gets a Dora fruit snack.

"Hoo-RAY!" she says as she skips to the car. -where she gets her mood-swings from I will never know..

It's fun ("fun" meaning amusing mostly, but sometimes downright annoying) for me to see how, as my kids' language skills improve, they are able to express what they want, what they don't want and what is an acceptable explanation.

Ben is my why-child. You know, the child that has a built-in "mommy's voice detector" so that as soon as I start talking his automatic response is "Why?" I do try to answer questions as much as I can and help with understanding, but I have pulled out the fail-safe I learned from my own mother a time or two. Listen to Ben's conversation with me this morning:

"Ben, it's time to brush your hair."

"Oh! I don't want to yet. I want you to take a picture of me with my train so I can take it to school."

"Why?" (haha! Two can play this game)

"Because I said so." (What? You can't pull that out this early in the game)

"Why?" (I'm not giving up yet)

"Because I SAID so."

Ben: 1 Mom: 0

What Do You Call...

2011-03-29T12:30:00.000-07:00

...this treat (as described by Ben today after he got home from preschool):

Mom: "What do you want for lunch?"

Ben: "Peanut butter and Jelly sandwich."
(pause)
"And we got chocolate chips for snack and mixed them and the peanut butter and we pour it on the cereal. And we get the white thing"
(pause)

Mom: "Powdered Sugar?"

"Yes, powdered sugar and it put it on it and Miss Lisa put the cereal in the bag and the... the... the.. What it called Miss Lisa put in the bag?"

Mom: "Powdered Sugar?"

"...and Miss Lisa put sugar in the bag and shake it, shake it, shake it. And she open the bag and put more sugar and shake it and it all white."

(silence)

Mom: "Then did you pour it in bowls?"

"No, we put it on the napkins and put it in the fridge and it be cold."

I don't think I've ever made it and not just eaten it right out of the bag...

So, what do you call this treat when you make it?

"I Need My Toolbox"

2011-02-24T07:22:00.000-08:00

I just found these pictures in my camera and the memory so warmed my heart that I had to share.

About six months ago, our neighbors were having problems with their water - they were out front working on it, when Ben saw them from the window. Naturally, he wanted to go outside and see what was going on. Almost as soon as he got outside, he came racing back inside repeating something intelligible (we couldn't understand much of what he was saying until about a month ago). He went straight to his closet and grabbed this:

And proceeded to do this:

And this:

And this:

He was so happy to help. So proud of his toolbox and his abilities. I'm sure he really thought he would have the right tool to fix the problem. Unfortunately, he was very disappointed most of the afternoon because his tinkering did not restore the neighbor's water supply. Paying their water bill the next day magically did the trick.

As his mom, I was so proud of his automatic reaction to offer help and his genuine concern for his neighbors. I know I have a little bit of that in me, but I can be a little reserved at times. My husband, on the other hand, is the same way as Ben - always willing to give of his time and talents. I need to be more like them in so many ways. See, there it is again, little warm fuzzies.

La-La-La LINOLEUM

2011-02-19T17:35:00.000-08:00

P.S. I'm Reference This Post

Yes, I’m still scrubbing this same floor. I wash it a few times a week, but nothing picks up dirt and grime like this stuff. And this is still mopping it daily:

Now that Joel is on a four-week rotation schedule, I’ve made the last day of each rotation my floor-stripping day. Originally I stripped the floor with Comet and a scrub brush, but I’ve found that Soft Scrub and a scrubbing pad works fine too. I scrub it, then I rinse it. Then I wash with ammonia and rinse again. Then on comes the Pledge for non-wax floors (With Future).

I get a pretty impressive shine from this process, but the last time I did it (two weeks ago) I decided that I needed to put a little more thought into whether or not it was worth it. (It was a particularly tiresome day which made my task seem unbearable at the moment)

First, I figured about how much longer we’d be in this house: 18 months

This means that I’ll be doing this 20 times before we’re out of here.

Next, I figured out how much money it was costing me per time: about $5.

This means that I’ll be spending about $100 just to keep scrubbing this floor for the next year and a half.

Then, I figured out how much time it was costing me: again about 5 hours.

Even though that includes waiting time for the shiny stuff to dry, it messes with my day, so I’m including it. I promise I don't (usually) just stand there and watch it dry.

So, at $100 and 100 hours of womanpower, I decided it was time to figure out the square footage I would have to replace.

204 square feet. And I was being generous.

So, I’m in the market for a cheap, decent floor that I don’t have to scrub on my hands and knees every four weeks. Suggestions? Pointers?

Dear Blog: Happy Vday

2011-02-14T13:39:00.000-08:00

I'm coming around to the idea of celebrating holidays...in my own way. Somewhere inside I truly believed that one day I would wake up and be stylish, crafty, and cutesy like so many of you. And I'd have the motivation to do some of the sewing, gluing, sanding, building, painting projects I've seen over the years. While I really think it's all very neat, it's just not gonna happen for me. Instead, I'll do it my way and be an admirer of the rest of you.

This is about as crafty as I get...there happened to be simple directions on the back of the box of cake mix I bought at the store last week. You pour the cake mix in a square pan, a round pan - then cut the round cake in half and assemble. Wa-La!

So - here's my "heart cake" with the top four people who own my heart. (sadly I could not include you all)

As I was putting the names on in no particular order, I was thinking to myself how neat it is that your heart expands to love so many people - especially little people. How I really do love my three kids the same...but wait, that's a lie. In all honesty, if I was writing the names as if size indicated how much I love them, Jake would be the John Hancock of my heart.

How horrible of me to say, right? I was feeling really guilty about it a few weeks ago, until I remember feeling the same way about Aubrey. I was panicked because she was a girl and Ben was a boy and I thought myself terrible for loving my little girl more than my little boy. But that feeling kind of went away and I was loving all my kids the same until just recently. Then I discovered that it's the AGE. There's just something about a baby from about 6-12 months that I find absolutely irresistible. Like I could steal him, and we could run away together and be as happy as could be. Judge me if you must, I certainly won't judge you in return. Although I can't see how anyone wouldn't be tempted to steal away this plump little 7-month-old:

Fine, I guess Captain Underpants is worth hanging around for.

And let's not forget Princess Cereal:

Joel isn't around for me to take a picture of, but these four have my heart, and I'm so grateful it's in good hands.

Aubrey Sour Toes

2011-01-25T13:18:00.000-08:00

Aubrey has a thing with counting my toes. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. SEVEN TOES MOM! (and that was just my right foot)

She really is funny - as long as I take deep breaths and try not to let the incessant whining, tantrums and general loudness get to me. My logical brain knows she's two, but because she's the second child, my less-than-logical brain sometimes expects her to act like she's older than that. Yes, I have two brains. I am so smart.

Here's a fun picture of her at Christmas time. Uncle Rob gave us all spray-War-head stuff (really sour liquid candy you shoot in your mouth). She loved it. Kept walking around asking for it from everyone. Actually, I'm not sure that she loved the "candy" as much as she loved the attention.

She truly is my daughter.

A Terrifying Goal

2011-01-22T06:16:00.001-08:00

Today's To-Do:
Find the bottle that's been missing for three days.

Yuck.

Jake

2011-01-21T07:09:00.000-08:00

I've been more that just a little self-absorbed this week. I hate when I do it, but honestly, it happens more than I care to admit. Interestingly enough, when I'm self-absorbed, I slack on the things that make me happy and over-indulge on superficial crap. ...but here I go again, talking about myself... Jeepers.

Jacob Michael turned 6 months yesterday. He is sunshine in my life. I'm not just saying that - believe me - I'd tell you if he was turd. He is a freakishly good baby, not that I'm complaining... although I wonder when I'll have to pay the piper.

He's also a very pretty baby, don't you think? I've been tempted to slap a flower on his head, put him in a dress and see how many what-a-beautiful-little-girls I can get.

What Does 30 Look Like?

2011-01-20T11:47:00.000-08:00

I've been telling people I am 30-years-old for a solid six months.

I've been telling myself that I am fine with turning 30 for even longer.

Still, Monday (the day before my birthday) I was an anxious wreck. THE LAST DAY OF MY 20'S????? REALLY????? Did I just sprout 15 wrinkles overnight? Am I ever going to lose the rest of the baby weight? Will I be able to get back into shape for soccer? How many more kids did my mom have at my age? Is this going to be ForEver?

So, Tuesday morning, I got up and took a shower (applause). I waited and waited all day for an anxiety attack, but was rather disappointed. It was a good day.

The kids decorated my cake.

My hubby took me out.

My friends were just awesome.

(no picture to prove it, so you may doubt it if you wish. You're probably already doubting that I have a husband anyway.)

Like I said, it was a good day.

In fact, by the end of the day, it was safe to say that the 30s might turn out even better than the 20s. Competing with my 20th birthday is no small task, either - I was on a Field Training Exercise in Basic Training, we happened to be on an extended ruck march all that day and into the night. My drill sergeant gave me one of those peach ring candies - are they called Peachie-Os?

Anyway, 30 isn't looking so terrible after-all... (says the eternal-optimist on Day 3 of a decade with 3,652 days in it)

Consider Yourself Carded

2011-01-17T08:07:00.000-08:00

I have absolutely no idea what "Christmas Card" etiquette is these days. Blog it? Facebook it? Email it? Actually stand up from my computer, leave my house and go to the post office to mail it?

A few years ago, when I was ridiculously proud and excited about being a mom, having a family, graduating from college, I think I sent a card to ANY person I thought would tolerate receiving a card from me. The next year, I didn't budget for stamps, so I didn't send out very many, but posted it here and considered it good. Last year I didn't do diddly-squat so, this year, I wasn't quite sure what to do. Who do I send them to? Did I get bumped from people's Christmas card lists for being fickle last year and lame the year before? I honestly don't care as much about being bumped as I do about sending a card to someone and having them feel guilty for bumping me.

So here's what I did (or think I did) this year.

I mailed a card to everyone that sent one to me (some of those are being stamped and mailed our tomorrow, but if you sent me a card and don't get one from me in a week, please let me know! I promise I am not intentionally trying to offend anyone). Then, I put those people's names on a "mailing" list for next year, because I figure they are Christmas CARD people.

Next, I made a .pdf of my card and emailed everyone that sent me a Christmas email. I didn't send the email to everyone in my address book, just the people who emailed me. Then, I wrote those emails on an "emailing" list for next year. I figure these people are Christmas EMAIL people.

And now, I have snipped a picture of that .pdf email of my actual Christmas card and I am posting it to my blog (above). That way, if you want to see what we've been up to (and if you visit this blog, I assume that you do) it's here for your viewing pleasure. I figure you are Christmas BLOG people.

And this is me, "simplifying" Christmas.

Devin's Wisdom

2011-01-01T12:46:00.000-08:00

I'm hoping that this will be a good way to get back into blogging. I'm not committing to anything here, just hoping...

My little brother had his wisdom teeth taken out while we were in Utah for the holidays. A million years ago when I had mine taken out, I didn't get put under, but he did. I've always heard that "waking up" from a general anesthetic can be amusing, but haven't witnessed it firsthand.

Fortunately, my mom was there and thought to bring her camera.
Unfortunately, she doesn't know how to use the video function.
Luckily, Devin does and wanted to share some things with us.

The original video is over 12 minutes long, but contains some fairly personal information (like his social security number). Hopefully my two-minute version is still fun to watch.

1...2...3...CHEESE!

2010-10-05T08:10:00.000-07:00

Not that I try very hard, but it's difficult for me to find a picture of the three kids together. You would think that in a 2-bedroom, 1-bath it would be hard NOT to be together.

Still, we get some of Jake and Ben:

Some of Aubrey and Jake:

Some of Ben and Aubrey:

And then when you finally do get one of the three of them, the only child that actually looks towards the camera ends up with crazy-alien eyes:

This Little Piggy Went WEE WEE WEE

2010-10-01T08:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, at one o'clock in the afternoon, I decided to go hiking. Last of day of September, no big deal, right? Not here. I think it was 108 degrees? So, basically, not my best idea ever, but with everything I've got going on right now, I was just grateful I could go. Little did I know that I would be actually thankful for the heat by the time I finished.

Normally, it's a 4.5-mile hike that takes me back around to where I park. (I'm not going to say where I go, in case I start going again regularly and some psycho reading my dangerously "open blog" decides to come harm me - see, I do have some sense of self-preservation.) Well, I was only 2 or 3 minutes into the hike when I realized I wouldn't be able to make it all the way around, so I decided to make it to the highest point and just turn around and come back - two miles total.

I am sweating like a pig (it's SO hot!!!).
I can feel every pound of the 19 I still have left to loose.
I am huffing and puffing and drinking water like crazy all the way up.

Thanks to all of these factors, it takes me much longer than expected to reach the top and by the time I do, I have to pee something terrible. (fortunately it's not the other - like last time) I consider stopping and finding a bush, but it's kind of difficult when you are at the highest point and exposed at every side. You would think that I could hold it for a mere mile, but you'd be forgetting that I just had my third child in July.

So, I keep walking and looking for a place to relieve myself, when I lose it. Not all of it, thankfully, but enough to show. Gross. Now I'm hurrying along, mortified by the thought of passing the next hiker (no, I wasn't the only crazy out there). It's reminding me of my mission where I laughed so hard I peed my pants. Twice. Maybe I should see a doctor.

At least the end of this story is happy. Remember how I said I'd be grateful for the heat? Well, it dried me right up by the time I passed the next hiker.

See - there's something to be happy about in just about any situation.

Everybody's Doing It

2010-09-28T06:13:00.000-07:00

When I told you my story about going "natural" for this last baby (and by last, I mean latest, not necessarily the last I'll ever have...I think...), I neglected to tell you that I was jumping on a band wagon of other moms I knew who'd had other children with epidurals, but wanted to do it naturally.

There was a discussion between us about why we wanted to go natural. Right now, I can't remember any of the really good feel-good-type reasons. Probably because I have this hanging on the wall in my kids' room (thanks Dandi!):

Oh, yes. I did it for "the badge." For the right to say "I did it." It's terrible, but it's the truth.

Pooped.

2010-09-27T13:13:00.000-07:00

In the first week we were home from the hospital with Jake, I found this very informative sheet of paper included in the stuff the hospital send you home with when you have a baby. I almost cried I was laughing so hard. Why didn't they have anything like this when I had Ben?

Truly, a picture is worth a thousand words.

If you can't tell what it is - it's an explanation of what is normal for newborn bowel movements. With pictures. Let's put up one at a time so we can get a closer look. Or better yet, let's have a quiz. Multiple choice:

1.
a)diarrhea
b)formula-fed
c)breast-fed
d)constipation

2.
a)diarrhea
b)formula-fed
c)breast-fed
d)constipation

3.
a)diarrhea
b)formula-fed
c)breast-fed
d)constipation

4.
a)diarrhea
b)formula-fed
c)breast-fed
d)constipation

And as a reward for taking this quiz (and hopefully not puking in the process) here's a video that's theme-related:

Cackle Cackle

2010-09-03T10:06:00.000-07:00

When I look at this picture, I can't help but think of an old witch cackling. Perhaps it's because I'm turning into one. Good thing I have smiley to put up with me.

Post partum isn't all peaches and cream for this witch. Somedays I'm on top of my little mommy world and somedays I'm in the "depths of despair" and can only hope that I get through the next moment without doing anything certifiably insane. I won't go into details, but sometimes I just like to put the bad out there with the good for people who think that they are alone in their sorrow, frustration and weaknesses. (cue Michael McClean's "You're Not Alone" - listen to the cheese and love it)

The End.

Dad Life

2010-08-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

Until I can find my camera cord (yup, lost again) please enjoy this:

And Then There Were Three…

2010-08-08T16:42:00.000-07:00

> Now that we’ve arrived at Jake’s actual due date (what a blessing it is to have healthy babies and NOT have to wait the whole 40 weeks!), here’s the story: But wait…before I go into the story of Jake’s birth, you need to know three things:

1. I wanted to do this birth without any pain medications and with as little medical intervention as possible. I had skimmed through a book about it and was practicing some pain management techniques. It was something on my “list of things to do.” You know, mop the kitchen floor, scrub the toilet, give birth naturally.

2. Joel is in his third year of medical school – which means rotations. He travels to various hospitals all over the valley – and a lot of the time that means an hour and a half trip each way.

3. Back in May, we’d seen a sale online, so my mom booked a flight for July 20^th through the 27^th. Even though I was due August 7^th, we thought it was a safe bet considering the other two came early. Plus, with her busy life, it was really the only week that worked for her to come anyway.

So, with all of this on my mind, I go in for my 36-week check-up on July 13^th and I find out that I’m dilated to a 3. Yippee! I proceed to walk two miles every morning that week, pushing Ben and Aubrey in a stroller, in 90+ degree weather – CONVINCED that I’ll go into labor on my own by the weekend.

No dice.

Monday morning (the 19^th) arrives and I am so anxious I can’t stand it. My appointment isn’t scheduled until the next day, but I just HAVE to know if I should tell my mom to come or not – so I call the doctors office and get an appointment for noon (on Monday). I have a friend watch the kids this time (learned my lesson from the week before) and find out I’m dilated to a 5+ and the doc tells me to get to the hospital to have the baby.

I tell him “No.” (due to reason #1 above)

He just stares at me, basically tells me I’m crazy, but he’s not going to put me in handcuffs and drag me over there.

But when I go home, I start having harder contractions (but nothing serious) late afternoon and since I know my body is basically ready for the baby, I ask Joel to ask for Tuesday off. I tell him that if I don’t go into labor on my own, I’ll let the doc break my water in the morning (due to both #2 and #3 above). When Joel gets home, we decide to go to the hospital just in case – a WONDERFUL sister from the ward offers to put the kids down to bed and spend the night on our couch. And of course, we stop at Subway on the way, since hospitals like to starve women in labor.

Blah, Blah, Blah – I’m dilated to a six most of the night and spend practically all of the night speed walking around the maternity ward. The nurses think I’m insane, but by morning, I’m dilated to an eight.

A side note on the food issue: I’d been sneaking milk from the fridge all night, but in the morning, one of the nurses tells me I can’t have any since I’m at an eight. I’m sad because I’m still not even close to screaming pain labor and I’m SO hungry from walking all night. A half an hour later, MY nurse brings me breakfast. Pancakes. Eggs. Cereal. The WORKS. I stare in disbelief: “You’re going to let me eat?” She just laughs and says “Sure! The worst that can happen is I have to clean up your puke.” I wanted to kiss her. And I did NOT puke.

Yes, that’s right. An eight and still not in “active labor.” The nurse called my doc who basically told her that whenever I was ready he’d come break my water. So, I waited until my mom arrived and around noon, he broke my water. I guess I should also say that right before he broke my water, the nurse checked me and I was at a nine. Two hours later, Joel suited up in his gloves and gown and eventually handed me this “little” guy:

8lbs, 4 oz, and 21 inches long (at 37 weeks!) It was like they handed me Ben all over again. We named him Jacob and were undecided on a middle name for a few days, but finally settled on Jacob Michael – after Joel’s brother, “Uncle Mikey.”

Before I plaster the rest of the pictures up here, let me just say that giving birth without pain medications was, oh yes, painful. I know I didn’t go through nearly the pain that most women go through. Although I had really strong contractions for the two hours after they broke my water, but I used my breathing techniques and think that I did fairly well in managing the pain. Of course, it wasn’t the hours on end some women have to endure. The part I wasn’t prepared for was the actual birthing. I feel like I now know a little of the pain of being quartered.

After Jake’s head poked through, there were still his broad Fulkerson shoulders to deal with. I didn’t expect to feel so much pain and pressure after the head came through and apparently screamed: “Just get it out of me!” (we didn’t know the gender) Way to play it cool, Sara. At least Joel did a great job with the delivery. It really was a special experience for all of us. Having my mom at my side was such a blessing too.

And, of course, it was all worth it. I am glad for the experience and our beautiful baby boy:

Move Over Pillsbury Dough Boy

2010-07-27T21:26:00.000-07:00

I was going to post this earlier in the month, but I was having trouble downloading photos from my camera. Thanks to Jake, I had to move around some furniture today and found my camera cord, so now we're back on track. I'll post Jake pictures (same ones from Facebook if we're friends there) later, but first I'll start with the last pregnant picture taken of me.

A little background on this beauty of a picture: This third pregnancy had me feeling frumpity-dump-slumpity. So, this one morning I was going on Relief Society visits and decided to spruce up a bit. I guess I didn't look in the mirror until I was just about it leave, because when I did, I couldn't help but crack up. Say hello to the giant pink marshmallow:

Look out Easter! Here comes the biggest pink peep known to mankind. Unfortunately, I only had time to take the picture, and didn't change clothes - so the lovely sisters I visited had to exercise restraint to not burst out laughing when they answered the door.

Parents: 1. Kids: 0.

2010-06-09T17:19:00.001-07:00

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

Sara Has Rolls!

2010-05-29T14:55:00.000-07:00

Not to worry, this is a food post, not a photo confession of my weight-gain this pregnancy. I scared you a bit though, didn't I?

Interestingly enough, although I've gained half a ton this time around, I haven't done much cooking. So, here's a shining afternoon where the kids and I got some good kitchen-bonding-time and it actually produced some mighty-fine eating for the family.

I'm being converted to pressure-cooking, this beef stew only required 20 minutes of cook time.

Daddy Did It

2010-05-24T07:49:00.000-07:00

Some friends came over and noticed this "little wound" on Ben's arm. When asked "what happened?" Ben simply replied "Daddy did it."

So, here's the story: Remember the bike trailer we inherited? One Saturday morning, I had had it with the Princess Aubrey's whining and told Joel I was taking her for a walk. I figured the fresh air and some exercise would do us both some good. While we were gone, Joel decided to take Ben on a spin in the bike trailer. Weaving around in the middle of the road may not be especially safe on a normal day, but on this day, there was only one child in the back - putting the trailer off-balance and, you guessed it, tipping it right over. Although Ben was buckled in, his instinct to reach out and break his fall resulted in nasty road rashes on both his wrists and pretty much covered his left forearm. The picture above was taken after a full week of cleaning, screaming, hydrogen peroxide, Neosporin, and bandages.

Or, like Ben said, "Daddy did it."

Mommy Healing

2010-05-20T14:40:00.000-07:00

This picture has absolutely nothing to do with this post. Sometimes I just don't know what to do with all the "cheese" I get whenever I pull out the camera.

First off, I only have two children, so most of my readers will just shake their heads and think "I have two/three/four times the amount of children you have, you have no idea what tough is" but alas, in my own little world, it's been a tough 6 weeks or so. I either can't get a break between at least one member of our family being sick before another one gets the exact same thing or the next sickness starts, or I get two days of "wellness" - just enough to clean my house, pay some bills, take a shower, catch up on some sleep and get a little grocery shopping done. Okay, and maybe take a trip or two out to Yogurtland. Ah, the healing powers of yummy and inexpensive frozen yogurt and good friends.

Back to my complaining (I can't BELIEVE I got side-tracked from complaining - so not like me) I've re-learned something about myself during this time - I am a TERRIBLE mommy to sick kids. I am much more concerned about cleaning up the puke or throwing in a load of laundry or disinfecting the walls than I am sitting down and cuddling with them - which is really what any sick kid wants from a mom.

The only thing I can think of that's better than a mommy cuddle is maybe a Grandma cuddle. WILL ONE OF YOU GET DOWN HERE PLEASE?????!!!

Cheese-Face

2010-05-13T15:05:00.001-07:00

I love her.

Let the Games Begin

2010-05-12T11:01:00.000-07:00

My mom's comment to the Chuck E Cheese post has me thinking that I might not be using my blog appropriately. I mean, it was for family that I originally started posting - since we live so far they like to see some of the day-to-day and pictures. But now my eyes are being opened to the full potential this here blog has. Specifically: Grandparent Wars.

If there's anything that just might be more enjoyable than whole milk and Double Stuffed Oreos, it's watching people dote over my children. When Gary brought us down our super-awesome minivan (more about this next-phase in our lives to come - I'm not ready to admit that we own one just yet) he showed up with two ginormous boxes of GeoTrax for Ben.* So - whatcha gonna do NOW mom?
*Ben meaning Ben and Joel.

Sunday Morning Golf

2010-05-11T11:48:00.000-07:00

Perhaps a Relief Society President shouldn't post about such sinful behavior - even in jest.

Perhaps they'll fire me for it.

Perhaps I should go find some more condemning photographs to share.

Chuck E Cheesin' it

2010-05-10T14:40:00.000-07:00

While (Great) Aunt Lauren and Uncle Bob were snow-birding here, they treated the kids and I and some of their cousins to Chuck E Cheese. It was a hit - notice that not one of the kids is looking at the camera...WAY too much to see and do to stop for a moment and smile.

Then, while Papa (Joel's dad) was down a few weeks ago, he took our family too. I didn't notice this when we went the last time, so it might just have been a temporary thing, but there was a sign up that said if you order food and show a military ID, you get 20 free tokens. Well, Joel and I both have military IDs, so CHA-CHING! And once again, the picture makes it look like the kids are incredibly bored - but really they are just bored having to sit for a picture instead of running around like the two monkeys that they are.

Mother's Day "Gift"

2010-05-08T13:37:00.000-07:00

New...or Sorta New...Family Diversion

2010-04-15T06:52:00.000-07:00

We were given this wonderful contraption by a friend, and that stylin' yellow bike by Joel's grandma. The kids love it - of course we've been using it for weeks and weeks now, so it's not really news, but catching up is fun too.

We're Alive and Well....thanks.

2010-04-12T21:19:00.000-07:00

Aww - you missed me! I am flattered by those of you who've called or facebooked or emailed because I haven't been blogging recently. I miss it and I'm glad to know some of you do too.

Yes, everything is okay with our family. I just, well, I'm just adjusting to a new schedule and new responsibilities and haven't quite found a complete balance. My floors are vacuumed, but the dishes aren't done. Oh well. I've wanted to post these pictures from the Glendale Truck Something-or-Another last month. Ben had a blast, as you can see. I'm too tired to narrate everything, so your job is to think of something clever for each picture and give me a comment (remember, comments = love) with your best photo caption. Smooches.

Whistlin' Wars

2010-03-15T09:12:00.000-07:00

Ben recently discovered that one of our straws (I won it at a Tupperware party) whistles if you blow into it. Unfortunately for everyone within earshot, it is the world's most annoying sound. More like the squeak-that-never-ends than a whistle.

Finally, I told him that if he wanted to blow the whistle, he had to take the whistle outside.

So...He did.

Not exactly what I was thinking, but at least it shows that HE is thinking. It goes something like this: "Hmm...I want to blow the whistle, but it's too chilly to go outside at 8am...but wait! Mom said that the WHISTLE had to be outside, not me! Moohahahaha. I can't wait to see the look on her face."

Ben: 1 Mom: 0

Joel's First Post

2010-03-08T20:35:00.000-08:00

A cat has been bothering us at night by nesting on top of the shelves in the back of my garage and loudly meowing. He makes Dasher go crazy too. So, I built a trap today when I got home from school.

Can you tell how it works?

Anyway, I was talking to Sara and heard a thump. At first, I thought it had sprung on its own (it had a hair trigger), but nope, I caught me a cat. As I was loading the cat trap into my truck I heard a loud meowing from the yard behind my garage. Hmmm. Oh well. Maybe I’ll get another one tomorrow.

I’m planning on driving the cat to school and letting it go.

-Joel

Bedtime?

2010-03-02T20:18:00.000-08:00

Joel and I are different people (surprise, surprise). I think bedtime should be a calm, soothing, yet structured time - brush teeth, read scriptures, say prayers, get a drink, sing a song, go to bed. As if you needed one more reason to call me the drill sergeant mom...

Joel has a completely different idea of what bedtime entails. Notice Ben's flushed cheeks and sweaty hair - this had been going on long before I grabbed the camera.

There's just no one who plays like a dad.

Honestly, though, sometimes I want to wring their necks. I NEED THESE KIDS TO GO TO SLEEP! NOT TO BE WIRED FOR ANOTHER HOUR! I NEED MY QUIET TIME! But alas, I realize there is wisdom in falling in love with someone who sees the world a bit differently. Who needs sleep anyway, right?

Man Breakfast

2010-02-24T06:19:00.000-08:00

Ben had just woken up when I got back from hiking this morning. Normally, he's not interested in eating until he's played for a while, but I still asked him if he wanted some breakfast. Cereal? No, he replies. Then he opens the fridge and announces: Hot Dog. Cheese.

It's weird enough for me to have a husband who generally prefers dinner left-overs to what I consider to be "normal" breakfast food - but a three-year-old?

Fat Lip

2010-02-22T12:01:00.000-08:00

Why does it always look worse in real life? Could it be I'm a bit of a drama queen? There was just SO much blood.

Household Gloves

2010-02-18T13:56:00.000-08:00

I bought some yellow rubber gloves at the dollar store a few weeks ago to help with the way the dishes have been piling up lately. It's one thing to do a few dishes, but when you've got three days worth and the crust and yuck that goes with it - I just felt like I needed some protection. I never used them before and I'm finding that I love them....

...but I think I'll go Bat-girl on my next pair.

Anyone else into these ladies? Two came in the pack I bought and I've considered having a bathroom pair also - it seems like that's an even nastier job that I should want protection for, but I guess since I never used them growing up, I hadn't really given it much thought. Am I the only one?

Toys

2010-02-09T15:30:00.000-08:00

I'm known to complain about pretty much anything (including imagined woes) and I've often focused my incessant whining on the separation between "mom-toys" and "dad-toys." Dads get computer games or cool new cell phones; motorcycles or remote-control airplanes. What do Moms get excited about? A new dishwasher! Microwave! That mop we've always wanted! True, we probably have a more extensive wardrobe than our spouses, but really, now, it's not like we can do without clothes like you can do without a radio controlled car.

Ah, it's good to know I've still got it in me. (the ability to fuss when no fussing is necessary)

So, when Grammie and Papa were down here last and taking Ben and Aubrey shopping for toys, they wanted to know what they would really enjoy playing with. After scanning the aisles, I finally realized why women are the way we are. We start young. What was the best toy for Aubrey? A kid-sized set of pots and pans. The fact that Ben plays with them too makes me feel a little better. But what did I recommend for Ben? Now, we must be fair, mustn't we? If I'm going to stereotype one child, I have to be consistent.

Thank you Grammie and Papa! We've had countless hours of use from all those new toys!

As long as I'm posting photos outside, what do you think of the newest LOST castmember?

Light and Fluffy

2010-01-28T08:47:00.000-08:00

Backyard Fires + Marshmallows = Male Bonding

On a Lighter Note

2010-01-27T15:28:00.001-08:00

I couldn't resist. A friend forwarded this to me and I forwarded it to some people, but I believe there are more of you out there that will appreciate it.

Wading Through.

2010-01-27T11:18:00.001-08:00

I've taken to reading about World War II and perusing the internet for tragic stories about miscarriages and still-born babies. I've not been through much of anything that even closely resembles tragedy. I believe it helps keep me grounded. Joel's face only asks "why?" when he sees the tear-tracks while I read about the woman who lost her first baby at 37 weeks. She'd heard the heartbeat a week before. She was full term. The cord wrapped tighter and tighter until, at her next check, there was no longer life.

Isn't it a wonder how many links you can find to similar situations on one page? That with technology, I can discover in seconds that even when ultrasounds are done that late in pregnancy, there's only a 35% chance that the technician will actually see the wrapped cord? And then I can move on to the next story about a child that lost his life at the window of his own home...

It can always be worse than it is. Having your child die in your arms from starvation or beating. Watching hatred and fear destroy a generation. The Holocaust claimed between 11 and 17 million lives - and that doesn't even touch the loss of those who bled their lives out on the battlefields. I twist uncomfortably wondering how many times it could have been stopped before it started. Wondering if I would have recognized such a moment and, if I did, would I have seized it, or dismissed it and ducked my head, intent on surviving?

I wonder.

And when I can pull myself out of the ickiness of humanity (intentional or otherwise), I am overwhelmed by how my so-called misery is nothing.

Gibberish

2010-01-26T08:16:00.000-08:00

I'm due August 7th.

Aubrey's dirt diaper was awesome. It's a disgusting story entailing a blow-out and poop scattered (unbeknownst to me) through-out the kids room. Kind of like poop hide-n-seek.

As a result of said hide-n-seek, Joel asked the question, "Why is there poop on my hand?" It wasn't funny in that exact moment in time, but after we realized what had happened and cleaned it all up, thinking about it sent me into fits of laughter. "Why is there poop on my hand?" Ah, the things we never imagine we'll say or hear our significant other say. I still can't help but giggle.

It's been my worst pregnancy by far. In fact, hearing myself laugh last night and this morning came as a shock to us all. I think my face has been stuck in a permanent I-don't-feel-good-so-don't-expect-me-to-look-good scowl since Thanksgiving. I know I wasn't even four weeks then and I had no idea I was pregnant, but that's when I started puking. Depression, anxiety and worthlessness followed. Nothing compared to what some people go through, but more than I have experienced to this point.

I'm fairing better thanks to drugs, sleep and my wonderful mother who spent six days with us over my birthday weekend. Her presence did more for me than anything else. Somewhere between having someone to talk to, clean with and seeing my children so happy, my over-all health has improved.

It's only supposed to cool down to 65 degrees this weekend. Seems to me that's a lot warmer than some other places I know (cough, Zion, cough)... I'm not telling you to CHECK THIS OUT... I'm just saying ;)

Eat Dirt.

2010-01-25T09:29:00.000-08:00

I was just glad it wasn't poop.

What Didn't Get Done

2010-01-05T13:58:00.000-08:00

I didn't do any New Year's Resolutions this year. I think it's the first time since I was 23 months old that I haven't insisted on a check-list a mile long about things that I need to improve about myself that I will also inevitably beat myself up about. You might say that's a good thing, a sign that I'm changing my obsessive ways. Or maybe you would conclude that I no longer have anything that I need to improve on (okay, at least one other person had to laugh at that one).

Really, I just haven't come to terms that its 2010 (pronounced "twenty-ten" please) and I haven't even sent out my Christmas cards.

Tis the Season...

2009-12-25T12:11:00.000-08:00

Tis the Season for unexpected surprises.
To open your door to find wrapped presents.

Tis the Season for generous people.
Family, friends and whoever sees a need.

Tis the Season for tears falling softly.
Watching the joy of children as they open Santa's gifts.

Tis the Season for a heart full of wonder.
For my Savior and those who follow His example.

Thank you.

Aubrey.

2009-12-16T11:50:00.000-08:00

Neglected Child Number Two had a birthday on Thanksgiving this year. There's only one candle on the cake, so I'm pretty sure she turned one. Thanks be to grandparents, aunts and uncles for yet another birthday actually celebrated.

The cake is placed far from Aubrey for a good reason while we are singing to her.

We knew we wouldn't have any trouble getting her to dig in like we did with Ben.

She didn't disappoint.
The chocolate kiss on her forehead is from Ben.

Have a Great Army Christmas

2009-12-15T09:07:00.000-08:00

My parents sent down a 12-days-of-Christmas Nativity set for us. Yesterday was Day 1: the stable. Ben has never been happier.

Okay, fine. So, I got into the whole Army thing too. I mean, I had to make sure he had the whole perimeter covered, right?

Pyramid Scheme

2009-12-08T10:32:00.001-08:00

I almost kissed the UPS guy that delivered my MacBook yesterday. Apparently my mother couldn't live without seeing the kids via Skype until January. Everytime Ben sees the computer he asks to talk to his grandparents (Maga, Grandpa, Maggie and Papa) anyway, so I guess the feeling is mutual.

My MacBook was delivered with a CD from the Vogelsberg family pictures. While I'm trying to get back into the scheme of things now that my computer is back, I thought you might enjoy this:

We used to do these pyramids when we were really young and there weren't as many of us. I have to say I'm surprised she got as many "good" shots as she did. My knee kept slipping off Brian's back, causing the whole pyramid to collapse. Good thing they love me.

Bacon Jam

2009-12-01T12:27:00.000-08:00

I'm looking for good ideas for the man of the house for Christmas and stumbled upon Bacon Jam. On a scale of one to ten, I give you an 8 1/2 for creativity... but, BACON jam? Really?

You can look forward to even more randomness in posting over the next six weeks as I am going cold turkey without my MacBook until my birthday mid-January. Sorta left it in Utah over Thanksgiving break. I think I'd rather have left my keys. Or a child. Or two.

Perspective.

2009-11-21T20:46:00.000-08:00

Ben got a hold of my camera. There were a lot of pictures to chose from, but those two are my favorite. They kind of say: "and this is my dad....and this is my mom..." as only a two-year-old can. I love that kid.

Not Really A Crafty Mom

2009-11-17T09:34:00.001-08:00

I found this in a "recipe book" that I forgot I have (I'm going to summarize the recipe and see how well the picture in your head compares to the actual thing)

Take a chocolate covered graham cracker (we used regular graham crackers and broke them in half), outline it with frosting and put a dot of frosting in the center. Place an animal cracker on the dot of icing and two life savers on the icing in two bottom corners of the graham cracker. Using the icing, make three vertical stripes down the graham cracker and over the animal cracker.

First: How'd did my description compare to the actual thing? (it's an animal cage train thingy)

Second: How sad is it that I'm not crafty enough to think of something like this on my own?

I love Ben's face here. He was just saying cheese and not smiling, so I gave him an example of what "cheese" meant. Yes, he definitely got the meaning of "cheese." And I can't tell you how many pictures I have of myself looking exactly like that...

Pack. Pack.

2009-11-16T11:51:00.000-08:00

I love this little man.

Spoiled.

2009-11-13T10:52:00.000-08:00

Aubrey's sleeping.

Ben's playing.

The dishwasher is washing my dishes.

The washer is washing my clothes.

I'm eating Jell-O and thinking grateful thoughts.

It's Hard Not to Be Happy When...

2009-11-11T19:34:00.000-08:00

...Chili's gives you a free dinner. Mmmm. I smile just thinking about it.

We'd heard (thanks to Renae) that Applebee's was doing a free entree for military tonight, so we packed up the kids and went out. Unfortunately, the line was ridiculously long, so we started to head home (finals week shouldn't be spent waiting in line for food). But since we'd "wasted time" in the car anyway, Joel suggested we stop at Chili's (up by Arrowhead) since there wasn't a line there.

Okay, I'm now boring myself. And I can't even say "well, to make a long story short," because I've already made it a long story. Ugh.

Before ordering, I mentioned we'd probably do the 3 courses for $20 deal, but were they doing anything for the military today? Turns out they were doing the same thing as Applebee's, but since we both had IDs and she knew we wanted the $20 thing, she asked the manager and they just gave us everything for free. Including Joel's drink. They were SO nice about everything too. The manager came by and thanked us for our service and for even coming in. Maybe he's a good actor, but it seemed pretty sincere to me.

You all know that I love coupons and deals and absolutely anything free, but a lot of times, people make you feel like crap for using coupons or making sure you get an advertised price or taking them up on an offer. This was just nice. If we ever go out to eat again (maybe on our 50th anniversary or something like that), it makes me want to give them my business.

The End.

Except I should probably tell you that the American Fork High School Marching Band was able to raise the money they needed (see below) and are leaving to compete in Grand Nationals tomorrow. I am so happy for them. I admit that I have mixed feelings about all that money, but that doesn't take away from how I feel about the sweetness of kids being able to reach a seemingly unattainable goal. GO AF!

The Greatest Generation

2009-11-09T06:14:00.000-08:00

Ben, Aubrey and I drove up to St. George, UT this weekend to see the American Fork High School Marching Band compete (my brother, Devin, is the center snare), but before I post pictures of the kids and family, here's a little background on the band, their show and what's happening today:

Click Here: Salt Lake Tribune

You may have already heard on the news about the bus crashing and the instructor being thrown from the window trying to keep the bus from crashing. Even without this added depth, their performance is very touching. The way these kids perform is inspiring, but again, knowing that they play parts composed by Heather makes it even more meaningful. Here's a YouTube video of the first performance at BYU after the crash. It's nine minutes long and I personally could watch it over and over again, but you could could just skip to the last minute or if you just want a taste of the emotion of it.

I hope they are able to raise the money for Grand Nationals, or at least feel good about such an incredible season regardless.

Call the Alpine Foundation at 801-756-8425 if you want to help.

Here Comes Trouble

2009-11-03T15:42:00.000-08:00

She gets into everything (you remember the pins). I'll have to go back in my archives to see if Ben was this bad this early on. Oh, wait. She turns one this month. My, my, how age creeps up on us.

Aubrey + Dishwasher = Mess

Aubrey + Water Cooler = Mess

Aubrey = Mess

So Much For The Tree House Video

2009-10-31T22:41:00.000-07:00

I'm not even going to make up an excuse. I just didn't do it.

Onward: Halloween.

We actually got trick-or-treaters this year. It wasn't as fun as I thought it would be. Both MY kids were dirty, wearing only their diapers, the house was a mess and everytime the door bell rang, I was sure it was CPS. Not really, but it felt hectic and so I just turned off my porch light, brought in the one decoration on our door and blew out the light in the jack-o-lantern.... ah, sweet silence.

We did our Halloweenie stuff last week and yesterday - here are the kids. Aubrey's a lady bug and Ben was Buzz Lightyear (you know, the opera singer).

Tree House (continued)

2009-10-27T07:12:00.001-07:00

Here are couple more pictures for today. I'm trying to upload a video, but I'm a little ADD at the moment.

Aubrey loves the treehouse too. We have to lock the "trap door" Ben uses to get up and down while she's up there though.

It's just a small, gated area for the kids, but Joel's done a great job on the details. More to come later...

TMJ

2009-10-26T14:53:00.001-07:00

When I'm stressed out or anxious, my TMJ (temporomanibular joint) hurts.

Now there's a random fact, right? Bear with me. I have had some anxiety recently, which I know will give each and every one of you a little chuckle at my expense, so here goes... ...I'd just gotten back into the swing of blogging last week - I even had a little idea for something for Thursday's post when out of nowhere on Wednesday evening, Joel finishes the coolest little tree house in our back yard.

Yup - that's it. The source of my anxiety. A tree-house throws off my groove for almost a full week. Can you imagine if I had REAL problems, people? My jaw would probably fall right off my face.

Anyway, I've been afraid that I won't be able to do this thing justice in just one post... then all of the sudden, I realized that I could probably devote more than one day to bragging about my husband and children. So, here's the first installment - Ben's first reactions:

Oh Boy!Cars, too!

It's a Little Dirty Up Here...

Taking a Break...

More details to come tomorrow folks. My jaw hurts.

On Thumbs and Pacifiers

2009-10-21T07:09:00.000-07:00

Ben officially turned two-and-a-half-years-old on Sunday and so Monday morning I committed myself to try to get him to stop sucking his thumb. He only sucks his thumb when he sleeps, so I figured the Band-Aid approach just might work.

He cried for about a half an hour and complained that the Band Aids were "owies" (hurting him) when he took his nap on Monday, but we haven't had any trouble since. Still, I use a lot of positive reinforcement when he goes to bed and wakes up and constantly talk about what a big boy he his - I figure he's my kid, so he likes to have his ego stroked, right?

One of the reasons for pushing to stop the thumb sucking now was dental. I worry about my babies' mouths and teeth looking all goofy. Vain, but true. So, I thought maybe I should get Aubrey off her pacifier too. Heaven forbid I just do one thing at a time.

Aubrey also only takes a pacifier when she sleeps, with the exception of church - since it's during her naptime, I figure she can have it then. I held strong for a day and a half with Aubrey before giving in. Oh, there was weeping and there was wailing and there was gnashing of teeth. I don't know why I was surprised - she's my kid, so she's pretty stubborn, right?

Aubrey - One. Mom - Zero.

Pandora

2009-10-20T07:57:00.000-07:00

I've been a big fan of Pandora for a long time. My obsession has increased exponentially now that Joel found a wire in our house that connects my lap top to my little stereo system - letting me listen wherever I am in the house. This morning I'm listening to Depeche Mode Radio while I do last night's dishes (I hate doing dinner dishes after breakfast). Luckily music makes it much more enjoyable. And not just any music - it's all music that I like, because I decide what my station plays. Music, sweet music.

Yesterday, however, I reached my 40 hours of free listening per month limit. How am I listening today, then, you ask? Did I pay for it? Bahahaha. Nope, I just signed on with another email account. Hopefully the Pandora people will forgive me. I figure we have four people living here that are enjoying not just the music, but the good mood it has put me in for weeks now. We're entitled to AT LEAST 160 hours of free music per month. 200 if you count the dog.

Chicken Tortilla Soup Recipe

2009-10-19T07:00:00.001-07:00

Oh yes, and I owe you this recipe from that post a while back. And just as a preface....I hope all of you who asked for it remembered that I am domestically-challenged-Sara and not super-dee-dooper-mom. It's easy. Yummy, but easy.

The Chicken Tortilla Soup is actually a six-can recipe that I use for food storage, but I alter it a bit for everyday use. It's a great let's-just-have-soup-tonight, winter meal:

1 can chicken
1 can diced tomatoes with green chili
1 can black beans
1 can corn
1 can cream of chicken soup
1 can chicken broth

Put it all in a pot together and heat until it boils for a bit. My mom adds a can of red enchilada sauce to hers. I never have red enchilada sauce on hand, so I haven't tried it yet.

It's a decent food storage meal, but to make it good for everyday, I crock-pot a couple chicken breasts with a jar of salsa for a few hours and then shred it (instead of using the canned chicken) before adding the other ingredients. And I always strain and rinse the corn and black beans (or else it has a funny after-taste). Add tortillas, shredded cheese and sour cream and it's actually quite good.

Ice Cream Man

2009-10-19T06:47:00.000-07:00

Ben's Chosen Profession:
Aubrey's Chosen Profession:Like mother, like daughter, eh?

I owe grandparents some pictures after such a long break from blogging. Really though, who wants pictures of sick kids anyway? These pictures are all from the Children's Museum in Phoenix.

Ben was hard to photograph - hence the blurry shopping cart picture - since he just couldn't seem to sit still for a second. I did get to catch him on the bike pulling Aubrey and Tanner (a friend) and through the window of the "stocking room" at the grocery store. Let me tell you, this is a great place to get a two-year-old nice and tired.
Aubrey's pictures were easy - just put her in front of the mirrors and she was as happy as pie.

Symptom: Non-Lethargic

2009-10-06T06:24:00.000-07:00

First, here's last nights Chicken Tortilla Soup made with love for my sick little family. I actually made it a few weeks ago, froze it in a Ziploc bag and just thawed it tonight, but the result is the same, except with less work today on my part. The picture also features my free 2 liter pot from Albertson's. I love free. Especially when it fills the gap between the too-tiny and too-gynormous pots I've been working with for the past year.

I've heard that when kids are sick they are lethargic. I think that happened once with Ben.

He still sounds like he's breathing through a straw - only it's an even smaller straw now. One would think that the lack of air or the labor of breathing would decrease his energy. Nope. He's been dancing around my livingroom since 5:30am. And that was after a four 4 hour nap, because he was up from 12:30 to 2:30am too.

In this house, when the kids get sick, MOM gets lethargic.

Sick of Cooking

2009-10-05T10:46:00.000-07:00

The kids are sick. Ben has one of those terrific sore throats that makes it sound like he has tuberculosis when he's exaggerating his breathing. Needless to say - we are avoiding going out in public. We did have to slip out for an appointment this morning, but plans for the next few days are to stay inside, clean, and get better.

Since I don't have much to blog about, I'll address Melissa's question in a post. I asked for cooking help a few months ago and got a lot of great responses and help, so I feel like I owe you a report back on how it's going. Here's what works for us (and please feel free to chime in if you have more suggestions):

#1 - Freezer meals. These are a life-saver and so versatile. I watched Craigslist for a while until I found a great price on a chest freezer. We keep it in the kitchen - tacky, but practical for us. Whenever I cook a casserole, I double the recipe (or just split the recipe, depending on the size) and use two separate casserole dishes (glass, aluminum, whatever works) and then I freeze one of them. Sometimes, I have a really ambitious day (or I just have a ton of cheap meat about to go bad) and I make a ton of casseroles/lasagnas/enchiladas in one day and freeze them to use over the next month. I also will sometimes combine all the ingredients needed for a crock-pot meal into a freezer bag. Then, all I have to do is defrost it overnight and throw it in the crock-pot in the morning.

Is this making any sense? I am SO lazy right now. I don't want to edit anything.

#2 - Plan. I don't use freezer meals every night. I just have them for when I don't adhere to my own advice of "planning ahead". Do you ever find that you are a little bored on Sundays? I try to use some of my Sunday downtime to prepare for the upcoming week. I don't do it exactly for breakfast, lunch and dinner and what I do plan I never follow exactly, but at least having a partial plan makes you take inventory of what you do have at home and what you need to get at the store. I hate when stuff goes bad in my fridge or pantry, but the only way I've found to prevent this is to plan better.

#3 - Left overs. Any left-overs from last night's dinner go into portion-sized tupperware that can fit into Joel's lunch cooler. Not only do they work for Joel's take-to-school lunches, but they work for me and Ben to share. Since everything is in portion-sized containers, it doesn't go bad as easily. Any general left-overs (like extra meat or pasta or rice or vegetables) are great for throwing into your next crock-pot meal.

#4 - Recipes as flexible guidelines. I have two crock-pot recipe books. I never have all the ingredients for one of the recipes, but looking through all the recipes usually helps me come up with something that I can make by combining a bunch of different, but similar recipes. RecipeZaar.com is great too. They have all different categories and they also allow people to comment on and rate a recipe. I don't even look at a recipe unless it has four stars and I always read a few comments because people trying a new recipe always change it and have good tips.

Again - I don't want to edit, so you'll have to help me - is there anything I missed or am just ignorant about when it comes to cooking for a family?

As for when to feed a kid "real" food, I waited a long time with Ben because I was unsure and he didn't seem very interested. Aubrey, on the other hand, only wants to feed herself (and has for a few months now), so she eats what we eat. For lunch she likes cheese sandwiches and peas - I tear the sandwich (just bread and cheese) into small pieces and smash the peas a little so she doesn't choke. Dinner is a mess. I just have to cut it up in small pieces and give her a bath every night.

Here they are: Clean and happy and playing with daddy!

And NOW I'm Prepared for General Conference

2009-10-02T14:29:00.000-07:00

Don't hate me for doing this. I GENUINELY enjoyed this forwarded email from Dandi. So, of course, now I'm going to one-up her and post it on my blog (did I just say that out loud?).

Nevermind. I take it back. You better hate me for doing this. I'd hate you if you did it to me... Still. It's funny and rings oh so true.

Articles of Mormonism

1. We believe in SUVs and minivans, as the form of transportation, and in knee length shorts, which are always nice, and in multilevel marking.

2. We believe that church ball players should be punished for their own fouls, and not for unsportsmanlike aggression.

3. We believe that through bread crumbs, cheese, creamy soups, and rice all casseroles can be saved through obedience to ward cookbooks and creativity in the mixing bowl.

4. We believe that the first layers and ingredients of the Dip are: first, beans; second, cheese; third, chopped tomatoes; fourth, the gift of sour cream; fifth, olives; sixth, salsa; seventh, guacamole, that is, if you have it.

5. We believe that a Mormon should have a distinguished or a cute name, that it is appropriate to name a child after a church leader or a historical figure including an ancestor, that alternative spellings and French prefixes only add to a name, and that when referring to the names of General Authorities, middle initials should be a part thereof.

6. We believe in the same wall decor that exists in many Mormon homes, namely, framed family proclamations, vinyl lettering, inspirational word signs, family photos, pictures of temples and Jesus, and so forth.

7. We believe in the gift of the re-gift, church books, crafts, family photos, baked goods, emergency supply kits, and so forth.

8. We believe in sparkling grape juice so long as it is nonalcoholic; we also believe in bringing root beer and sprite to ward parties.

9. We believe in all that we have scrap booked, all that we will now scrapbook, and we believe that we will yet scrapbook many great and important things pertaining to our family, friends, pets, and vacations.

10. We believe in the literal mixing of ketchup and mayo and in the generous application of ranch dressing; that CBAs (church-based acronyms) will be used to describe YM/YW, PEC, the Y, NCMO, and CTR; that Mitt Romney will get Mormons to vote for him any time he runs; and, that the Mormons will enjoy reading Twilight and The Work and the Glory.

11. We claim the privilege of trying to identify common acquaintances with any visitor at church, and allow all other people at church the same privilege, and let them name drop the names of Famous and general authorities how, where, or what they may.

12. We believe in being subject to scoutmasters, pampered chef hostesses, and the writers of the U.S. News and World Report Rankings for professional schools, and in obeying, honoring, and sustaining Glenn Beck.

13. We believe in being above average, good at crafts, optimistic, and being fifteen minutes late everywhere we go. Indeed, we may say that we follow BYU football. We believe rumors about famous people joining the church, we hope to meet the three Nephites, we have endured many pyramid schemes, and hope to be able to endure all pyramid schemes. If there is anything cheap, free, sold in bulk, or given away when somebody is moving, we seek after these things.

Locked

2009-09-30T18:51:00.000-07:00

This is my oven an hour ago:

Not the greatest picture (my hand was shaking with rage). That's chicken enchiladas trapped in my oven, compliments of Ben and a really old oven locking system.

After much pulling, jiggling, mental cussing (me, not Joel), and grunting, Joel (my hero) finally shook the cleaning lock loose and...

Wah - La! Dinner is served.

Notice: Ben is still alive and allowed to eat dinner. Sometimes I can't believe how many times I punish him for his inquisitiveness, innocence and for being a freakishly strong two-year-old.

Pin Cushions & Rubber Mallets

2009-09-19T13:43:00.000-07:00

Seriously. Who needs toys?

Maybe just people who want to say out of the news - Pins discovered in dead 10-month-old's stomach. Toddler in custody for beating dog to death with a mallet. Stuff like that.

Don't Drink The Water

2009-09-17T12:34:00.000-07:00

SplashFest 2009.

How I can forget to put up the dog's bowl EVERY SINGLE DAY, I don't really know, but Aubrey definitely gets a kick out of it. Why, oh, why do we bother purchasing toys for babies?

On that note, I had a stroke of genius the other day that I just have to share. Since we got back to the AZ heat, we've talked about buying another wading pool for the backyard. I hate buying them for about a million reasons, but to sum-up: they break so easily, they take up all our backyard space, and they get so dirty so you are always dumping it out and re-filling it...unless you get one that comes with a top.

Then, it hit me. And it was oh so brilliant.

The travel-top-carrier for our car. Size - Perfect. Durability - Perfect (it can withstand 80 mph on the freeway). AND IT HAS A TOP!!! Actually, I turned it upside down and used the bottom as a top, since the bottom has screws in it and I didn't want Ben to hurt himself. And the added bonus is that since it does lock, Ben can't open it on his own. So, I can still completely trust him in the backyard playing with the dog and not drowning in our "pool."

That's pretty much the best I've done this week as a mother though. I feel lazy and I'm indulging the lazy feeling, so now I have guilt. Gotta snap out of it, but I don't have the motivation. Maybe I can find some on Craigslist.

Behind Closed Doors

2009-09-15T09:42:00.000-07:00

I took this video about a week ago to record Ben's new-found obsession: Snow White. I post it now because both kids are in their room with the door closed. They have been for 15 minutes now.

Oh, how I hope Ben's not Ah-Digg-Ah-Digg-Diggin' on her.

I Knew It!

2009-09-08T10:29:00.000-07:00

KitchenAid: You Earned It

2009-09-04T10:00:00.001-07:00

We accidentally left the spoon in our really nice blender a few months ago and broke the blade and jar (one unit). Browsing online, I found that the KitchenAid store price was actually the best for the replacement part, so I called them a few minutes ago. Apparently I'm still under warranty, so they are sending one for free.

Free? Really? But I just told you we broke it....

Gosh. As someone who is a coupon-clipping, deal-finding maniac, it didn't feel right not to have to clip, grovel, beg, hint or even ask for a deal. "Free" The word itself makes my heart sing, but not having to work for it at all? I really don't know what to do...or say. AND they've given me something to blog about today. It's like I won the lottery or something.

Thank You KitchenAid!